Debbie Hatch | Family & F.I.T.
I’ve been reading a bit about Jade Socoby over the past couple of days. Muscle & Strength and Girls Gone Strong have both written about her and I think you’ll find her as inspiring as I do.
Jade hails from Maine and this girl has lost 130 pounds over the last 2.5 years. More than her body has changed though – and you know those are the things I focus on.
1. What are you most grateful for?
“I am grateful for the family I have in my life and the friends that stuck by me even when I stopped drinking every weekend.”
This is huge! I can tell you, it is one reason many people don’t change their own lives. I, personally, lost several friends when I started competing. Several of my clients have struggled with a lack of support from family and friends.
- Friends (and sometimes family too) don’t understand why you want to stop partying and start taking care of course. “If you’re not going to be fun any more, I don’t know if we can hang out.”
- Friends (and sometimes family too) seem to be the ones encouraging us to give up on such goals, in fact!
I think there are a couple of reasons for this. First, it can make people uncomfortable. If we’re doing what they “want” or “know” they should also be doing, it can be hard not to feel guilty.
Second, though, many times when we’re making these changes to work on ourselves, we complain. “Ugh. I have to go to the gym again today.” “You’re so lucky. I can’t eat that pizza…or cake…or whatever” Our family and friends don’t want to see us miserable. If you’re so unhappy, they wonder, “why do it at all?”
No one is “making you” do this. You’re making a choice. Stop complaining about it. Good for you!!!!!! You’ve made a great choice.
This is (another reason) why mindset is so critically important!
YOU have to be ready to make any change for YOU.
It won’t work, if you’re trying to do it for anybody else.
…and, if you’ve made a decision to do this for yourself, stop complaining.
2. What is the biggest thing you’ve noticed since you’ve changed your body?
“My biggest accomplishment (as a side effect of lifting) was overcoming my social anxiety. When I was 320 pounds, I wouldn’t even leave my apartment unless I absolutely had to. Being seen in public mortified me because of how embarrassed I was about how i looked and who I was. Now I love meeting new people and staying busy.”
You have to like yourself right now, right where you are, exactly as you are – even if there are some things you want to change.
Caring about yourself though, making changes, and becoming more of you (more confident, more healthy, more fit) makes a huge difference in how you feel in the world.
3. What advice would you give someone looking to make their own transformation?
“Get in the right mentality. If you’re not mentally ready, you may not make it. I’ve quit more times than I could count because I wasn’t mentally ready for the change. You’re going to have bad days and you’re going to get off track. Don’t get discouraged and just keep pushing. We all have bad days, we’ve all gone off our nutrition plan. It’s not the end of the world, just pick right back up.”
Mindset Matters Most.
You have to want to do this for you.
Until you determine what is holding you back and how to deal with that, you are not going to make sustainable change. Until your reason for wanting to do something is bigger than your reason for not wanting to, you are not going to make sustainable change.
“Stop weighing yourself every day. The scale can in fact be your enemy. My weight goes up and I have to take my lifting belt in a notch. Go by how you look, feel and how things fit!”
“Don’t be intimidated being the only, or one of a few, females in the weight area.”
It can be scary walking into the gym for the first time and, definitely, walking into the weight room. I know. Jade knows. Any woman who’s ever entered that “hallowed, testosterone infused domain” knows.
Here are a couple of things to remember as you get started.
Strength is not only for males.
A. Other people are not really looking at you. It might seem like it, but they are there to get their own workout done. Yes, they may glance in your general direction. Who cares. PS You’re looking at them too – are you judging?
B. You are there for YOU. Do what you came to do and don’t let anyone else deter you from it.
C. Have a plan going in. Walking into the gym, standing there looking around and trying to figure out what to heck to do, is uncomfortable – for everybody!!!!! I don’t like it either, and I’ve been doing this for a while. Make/get/print a plan before you walk through the door and then follow your plan.
D. It does get easier. Keep going.